Recently it came to my attention that the word “YOLO,” an acronym standing for “You Only Live Once,” has become popular with the kids (as in “Fine, I’ll do another shot - YOLO!”). I did some research and I found out that YOLO is just the tip of the iceberg in terms of hip 2012 lingo. Get ready to feel really old, because I had never heard of any of these, but apparently they’re being used everywhere:
YOLO: You Only Live Once
YOLOLO: You Only “LOL” Once
YOTROLOLOO: You Only “Trololo” Once
YOLOLO NOHOMO: You Only “LOL” Once, and I don’t mean that in the gay way
YOWO SOSOPOLOS: You Only Wear Orange So-So Polos
“You’ll never win the fashion competition. YOWO SOSOPOLOS.”
YOWO SOSOPOLOS SOHOMO: You Only Wear Orange So-So Polos, and I do mean that in a very gay way
“You’ll never win the fashion competition, sweetbuns. YOWO SOSOPOLOS SOHOMO.”
YOYOKO ONOSOCO: You’re Only Yoko Ono, So Chill Out
“You don’t have to create world peace by yourself. YOYOKO ONOSOCO.” (Must be spoken only to Yoko Ono)
YOHOHOHO BOSODOCOCOA: You Only “HoHoHo” But Once, So Drink Our Cocoa (Must be spoken only to Santa Claus)
YOLOMOFO HELLOMOTO: You Only Live Once, Motherfucker (Must be spoken only by Samuel L. Jackson in a Motorola commercial)
YOYOYO OSO YOYOSOLO OWO LOCO PO-PO: You Only Yo-Yo Once, So Yo-Yo Solo, Obviously Without Crazy Police Officers
CH Live - Pat Cassels
Exactly what everyone’s lives needed, a gif-ed form of Pat’s standup
Look at this photo from the upcoming Comedy Awards.
(Source: nineties-nickelodeon)
(Source: sampsonian7)
rumors.
rumors are never fun, I just went to my little sisters Jr. High play and I remember being in the plays when I was young too, and it was awful. you see theater kids are suppose to be the good ones. They are suppose to be the ones that are actually kind to you. I mean it’s hard when you’re such a nerd like me. I mean, I slicked back my hair everyday, I had never talked to a girl until 7th grade. I was the epitome of a loser. it’s just how i had always been. I remember i liked this girl back then and she put me in her contacts as “do not answer”. it’s been 7 years later and that still hurts me. I guess I’m just the kind of person that gets hurt bout that kind of stuff. Anyway, there was this rumor going around that I got boners alot. (childish 7th grade stuff) anyway, I didn’t even know about this rumor till like 3 years later. And it makes sense now. but it just wasn’t even close to being true. Rumors are so contagious. People really thrive on it. Idk what’s the point of this. Just… bullshit.
High School is the best four years of your life
a fucking asshole/dumbass
child story
being “fucked up” starts at a young age, for me, it was because i let my mom dress me, and she dressed me like a nerd, therefor i was one. there only way i could get people to talk to me and/or say nice things to me was if i made them laugh, one of the only compliments i can remember is once someone said i reminded them of Adam Sandler. i’m nothing like him, but i was funny, and when your 6, that makes you the same person. anyway, i had this best friend, david. David made me cry laughing, i remember we were writing this story about an elephant who sat on a rock and his butt hurt and it turned red. David drew a picture and it was HILARIOUS! oh my goodness, it was like the best time i have ever had… then… the bitch came. “the Bitch” of whom i speak, is monica. Monica was by far the prettiest and coolest girl at our school. and my arch rival. everyone liked monica, and monica had a best friend jenatte, jenatte was like her bitchy sidekick. i acknowledge i’ve used “bitch” alot. i will try to calm down now. I’m listening to muppets now so i’ll be better. anyway, what happened was monica heard me and david laughing and writing our story and she needed “help” from david on writing hers. first off, i was the better writer, second she’s a bitch. okay last time. sorry. anyway, david knew i didn’t like monica and how her and her sidekick picked on me all the time. so they ended up becoming close and when recess came he hung out with her and jenatte at the bike racks. that was the cool people area, they would sit on them and act like king and queen of the class. i decided to sit pretzel in the middle of the parking lot and cry. the best part is, david and monica laughed at me. that’s when i became fucked up. that’s where I THINK it started. being fucked up, is all based on experiences and how you as a person and your DNA reacts to it. Some people are born moody and they respond differently then someone who isn’t moody. everyone is different. everyone is retarded. everyone needs help. just some are more obvious.
my email to Mr. Mikes
Just want to tell you right off the bat that I do respect you as a
teacher, very much. I mean I don’t know you that well, however I do
know Mrs. Mikes after having had her twice now, and I really have
respect for her. Out of my whole high school experience she would have
to be in my top 5 of teachers. She does such a great job of being able
to understand different people for being different and highlighting
it. She knows how it is best to communicate with people because she
can read them. I had always just appreciated that about her and when I
saw that I would have you this semester I was happy, cause I’m sure
some of that rubbed off on you and I had always hated gym so I thought
maybe it would be a bit easier. Now gym and English are very
different. Someone can be good at English even if they haven’t really
before. Gym however, and being “athletic” that takes time, that isn’t
something someone overcomes overnight.
As far as the “punishment factor” that goes into this, I’ve thought
about it and I came up with multiple different things. At first I was
upset, and I was thinking of how high school in general is unfair, and
I guess so is life. Maybe it’s my young and adolescent mind but I kind
of hope that the “real world” is even just a bit more fair than high
school. I have a feeling that it will, I mean I don’t know about me
specifically but I know that people like me usually get it a bit
better than those who do drugs and pick on people all through-out high
school. Like this might be hard to believe but, I actually use to be
a pretty big fan of sports, loved watching, even enjoyed playing, the
only sport I can still stand is baseball (life-long Cubs fan, born and
raised in Wrigley) and just how much time I’ve spent watching baseball
I could never stop liking it, but when I played football freshman
year, I wasn’t the best, however I wasn’t the worst. Yet I still got
picked on the most. Never ever did I get picked on by the football
players (at least not at the practices) but who did bully me the most
that year, the coaches. I get it, they want everyone to do their best
and be the best. But I knew for a fact that the people who were on the
“A-Team” were all these awful people, awful guys who smoked pot and
drank every weekend. Then me, someone who never did anything bad was
all of a sudden such an awful person, sure I was in the wrong
environment, thank goodness I found theater people. But that opened my
eyes to how mean people can be even older people. It should be how
unfair life really was. So I thought if this punishment for us should
really be “fair” it should only be done to the people who didn’t do
anything wrong. Multiple reasons, one, this will show the people like
me that life isn’t fair and we will have to work harder to accomplish
anything and therefore we will and we will be successful because of
it, and it will give all the jerks in the class the idea that even
though they think “oh I’m still in trouble” in the back of their mind
they will be thinking “I don’t have to work as hard” which hopefully
they will continue to do and then they will fail in life. This idea
was soon realized to be a bad one.
My next idea was almost like the other side of the coin, however this
caused for a lot trust which is never something you should expect from
high school students. Basically how it works, is most of those people
who do the bad things and then have to physical punishments are very
happy about it, not really happy, but they like to pretend they are
happy because they know it bothers people like me. Like if someone
were to throw a ball at someone’s face and you were to tell the whole
class they had to run tomorrow, someone would go up to this kid the
next day and say “gotta run today” and he would go “yea, I know, can’t
wait” because it’s easy for them and they are going to work out anyway
so it’s just simple for them. They like it that they don’t have any
trouble with all this and the people who DO have trouble with it is
the people who they want to hurt in the first place. So really by
making us do this work you’re helping out the bullies even more
because people like me are the ones getting more punished then anyone.
We are the ones who get upset cause we didn’t do anything, we are the
ones super out of breath, we are not the ones in control. These
activities just prove more that the athletic people are in control and
there is nothing people like me can do. We are lesser of the “gym
class goers” Anyway, so I thought maybe we just ask them, “those who
were throwing balls, stand up” they would have to run. They want to
run anyway. It’s just they are soooo cocky about how much of an
asshole they are in front of everyone else, I would just hope they
would do the same in front of you. But of course that wouldn’t happen.
So I came up with one more idea. A test. I enjoy reading, it’s what I
do. Reading helps me escape from the real world, I can embody a
different person, a different character and experience what they are
experiencing, it’s the same reason I love movies and the same reason I
do theater. In my mind, I like to think I’m smarter than some of the
jerks in our class, If the punishment was that we had to study for a
quiz or a pop quiz on maybe good sportsmanship and maybe the sports
we do in class and stuff. Not a quiz on sports outside of class, cause
then once again, like always the athletic more popular assholes get
the upper hand. I wouldn’t even know how that would work. When it
comes down to it, I really have no idea. The reason I don’t have an
idea is because I’m not a teacher. You are. I’m really not a guy for
trust, because I believe everyone will hurt you in life. I don’t like
to trust people cause as soon as you do they hurt you. That’s just my
experience at least. But I do trust you. I know that you can make the
best decision for this class. If I’m penalized in the process, fine, I
guess that’s life. I don’t know anymore. I just want to leave high
school. There are so many worse things in this world, we should be the
happiest of humans on this earth but someone we still find a way to
make each other’s lives miserable. Sorry, I feel like I’ve just been
rambling. It’s just not often I find someone who actually listens to
me. I’m sorry for freaking out today. It’s just one of those days I
guess.
I’m a much better writer then I am a talker. Guess that’s what
technology has done to me, I’ve just never really gotten good at
confronting people or anything. Anyway, thanks for everything,
anonymous
p.s. I am a very good at hiding things. I am an actor after all. I
like to make people laugh, ever since I was young, it would be the
only way I wouldn’t get my butt kicked. So if it ever seems like I’m
being a goof off, that’s why. Because in the big picture of it all, if
we lose a game, who cares, as long as we got a good laugh of it, and I
know i can’t win games. And especially in gym class, people can get
very upset and competitive about stuff. Anyway, have a great night.
Say hi to Mrs. Mikes for me, and the little baby girl. Hope all is
well.
awesomepeoplehangingouttogether:
Al Pacino and Christopher Walken
